angry kidEpisode 2 of Raising Humans Podcast: When you have an angry kid, can you stay calm?

How do you feel, (and what do you do?) when your child gets really angry and starts shouting? Do you stay calm? Amidst the screaming, the tears, and the accusations there are ways to stay focused and be the wise guide for your kids you want to be.  Let’s face it, it takes a saint not to get upset. In this podcast, Gwen tells the story of a time when her daughter exploded about something she wanted badly and how she and her husband dealt with it, both in the moment, and later on.

How can parents handle their own emotions in the heat of the moment? What about the decision they are being forced to make on the spot? How can emotional intelligence help navigate strong feelings and set the tone for better communication in the future? 

Here are some tools for your EQ Parenting Toolkit to help in these tense moments.

One of the Six Seconds competencies is “Know Yourself” and within that, we talk about recognizing patterns. If you go on autopilot when your child is angry and yelling, what kind of reaction do you have? You can raise awareness of your patterns by keeping a log or diary of your regular reactions to anger.

Try this:

Fill out the sentence: When I (action), I feel (feeling name).  Or When I (feeling), I (action).  For example, “When my child yells at me in anger, I feel anxious and angry.”  Or, “When I shout at my child, I feel embarrassed.”  Over a week or two, you will notice patterns and can decide how you want to respond and begin changing the patterns and acting more in the moment than on autopilot.

More episodes of Raising Humans
Here are some helpful links from Six Seconds

From our Parenting store:Pocket Full of Feelings:  http://6seconds.org/newstore/products/pocket-full-feelings/

http://6seconds.org/newstore/products/eq-for-families-emotional-literacy-workshop/

 

And a few other links:

From the Child Development Institute: https://childdevelopmentinfo.com/how-to-be-a-parent/angry_child/

From Aha Parenting: http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/emotional-intelligence/angry-child

 

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Rachel Goodman

Rachel Goodman

Peabody Award-winning broadcaster and communications professional, editor, producer, and writer for effective outcomes. Ms. Goodman has been a radio producer for much of her career, specializing in short features and documentaries. Some of her work includes Southern Songbirds: the Women of Early Country Music, Pastures of Plenty: A History of California's Farmworkers, and The Boomtown Chronicles: Reflections on a Changing California. Ms. Goodman teaches journalism at Cabrillo College in Santa Cruz County. Her goals are to facilitate positive change in the world through effective communication, and to continue conducting her work with the highest level of integrity possible.
Rachel Goodman