Balancing Burnout to Embody Coaching | 🌱 EQ Coaching News • Six Seconds

A wellbeing gift for you & your clients that’s central to your role of coach. This is at the heart of International Coaching Federation competency #2: Embodies a Coaching Mindset. In this Era of the Amygdala, balance is elusive, so I’d like to share two important tools for that (#1 is free!) for you & clients. More below, but first…

👋🏽 my top 5 recommended events & articles:

Learning Together

Enrich yourself by joining the EQ Coaching webinars & livestreams including free sessions on Supervision, Equity, Languishing & becoming a coach!

Is Mental Healthiness part of coaching?

How can emotional intelligence help with mental wellness? Coaching isn’t clinical, but as I explain in this article, there’s a lot of mental healthiness that’s in our domain (plus this includes 50 possible action steps that will help with the tools I explain below)

Put empathy at the ❤️ of coaching

Will AI take over coaching? It depends! If you do transactional coaching, then yes, AI will soon do that better. But transformational coaching is rooted in empathy, which is the future of work.

Using contracting to strengthen coaching

Here’s how to use contracting as a process for making coaching work better. 95% of the times where I’m dissatisfied with my performance as I coach, my “aha-again” is to do better with contracting

Keep growing as a coach

Experienced coaches know it’s “forever work” – we’re here as learners. The new EQ Coach Supervision sessions provide a method & support to go to the next level (there’s a free webinar on supervision coming up)

Click here to subscribe to the EQ Coach Newsletter

Balance at the 💙 of Maintaining a Coaching Mindset

Burnout is big. I posted last week on LinkedIn about the 4 causes of burnout and how I’m working to address these as a leader (please join the discussion!)

Now let’s go deeper into this topic for us as coaches – because it turns out, renewing ourselves is a central part of our job.

I like the word “maintaining” in ICF competency 2. It’s not enough to grow this mindset, we have to do the work to keep it in good shape. Just like we take our cars in for routine maintenance, there’s work to be done over and over on being a coach.

We’re in the ‘amygdala era’ w volatility & emotional instability. This will affect us, unless we work hard to restore balance. Here’s how to do that as a coach

Click to tweet

There’s a LOT going on in the world right now that’s “anti-coach” – we’re living in the era of the amygdala. Our most recent State of the Heart research documented part of this increased volatility and reduced social support (you can download it here – or a short link to share: 6sec.org/soh ).

🚨 News alert!

That disequilibrium is affecting us, and our clients. It means we have to “bring our coach cars into the shop more often.” I’ve been practicing this myself, and used this with many clients over the last six months.

Step 1. Learn the balance scale.

This is a super-simple but extremely powerful idea: Every day, we are setting ourselves up for what comes next. Our daily choices today can set ourselves up for increased volatility, stress, dismay… or for greater equilibrium tomorrow.

Last year, I was talking to one of my kids about a stressful situation, and all the factors that made it hard. I asked them: Next time, what can you put in place to help you balance this load? Inspired by that conversation, I made this free online tool you can use to reflect on balance – and today we just released an updated version!

I show this to clients and encourage them to add factors that are draining & renewing. The + icon lets you type to add new ones. ⚠️ The more weight there is on the left, the more is needed on the right.

Step 2. Apply this to your coaching mindset.

Here’s how the International Coaching Federation defines the competency:

2. Embodies a Coaching Mindset Definition: Develops and maintains a mindset that is open, curious, flexible and client-centered

1. Acknowledges that clients are responsible for their own choices
2. Engages in ongoing learning and development as a coach
3. Develops an ongoing reflective practice to enhance one’s coaching
4. Remains aware of and open to the influence of context and culture on self and others
5. Uses awareness of self and one’s intuition to benefit clients
6. Develops and maintains the ability to regulate one’s emotions
7. Mentally and emotionally prepares for sessions
8. Seeks help from outside sources when necessary

🏁 Use the balance scale to consider 2-3 factors that take you out of your coaching mindset. What can you add on the right to balance those?

Step 3. Go deeper with TFA

Central to Six Seconds’ methodology is learning the differences between & interactions among our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions = TFA. Looking at your coaching mindset through your TFAs takes you to a level of understanding to transform the situation.

For in-person, I recommend purchasing the TFA Cards as a “must have” – this shifts “everything” and let’s people put emotional intelligence into action in minutes. Here’s an explanation.

During covid, people asked us for an online version, so we made the TFA app (it’s a web app so you can use it from any device, and it’s an annual subscription that allows you to create an online log of your TFAs which is incredibly useful).

3a. TFA the Drains

Using the cards or the app, explore one of the items you put on the left side of the scale (drains). What TFAs contribute to this item coming onto your personal balance scale? Even something that’s draining you is there for a reason. Exploring the TFAs will help you find that.

3b. TFA the Supports

Do the same for something on the right (supports). What TFAs let you bring that onto your scale? This is essential because of course we KNOW that these supports are supportive… but we don’t always access them. The TFAs are a kind of pathway or stepping stones to activate what you’ve put on the right side of the scale.

⚠️ Tip! Remember that the TFAs form a dynamic triangle – each part affects the others. If you’re having trouble reducing something that Drains or strengthening an asset that Supports, it’s likely you are not accessing all 3 parts of the TFA triangle.

Final step: Share!

I’d love to see lots of coaching mindset balance scales online! I’ll be sharing mine, and I hope you’ll tag @6secondseq on yours – or on linkedIN we’re @Six Seconds. You can find our English social media channels below.

See you next month for the next 🌱EQ Coaching newsletter.

If you were lucky enough to have a friend forward this to you… please subscribe here!

Warmly,

– Josh

Tools for Certified Members…

Account Login

Tools System

manage assessments

EQ.org

cert eLearning & library

Knowledge Base

get how-to info

Help Desk

get tech support

Contact Us

Plus for everyone…

EQ Store

buy resources

TFA Online

TFA cards app

Event Calendar

quickly find all classes

Author
Recent Posts

Follow me

Joshua Freedman

CEO at Six Seconds

Joshua is a cofounder and ceo of the Six Seconds Emotional Intelligence Network. He is a Master Certified Coach (ICF), and the second of his 5 books is the international best-seller, At the Heart of Leadership. He's passionate about the spark that ignites at intersection of compassion and purpose.