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Whole and Present: Spiritual Directors Deepen Development by Practicing EQ and SEQ
When spiritual directors in training add structured emotional intelligence and spiritual emotional intelligence practice to their formation, those who engage most deeply show measurably stronger development – and the data suggests the combined EQ+SEQ approach outperforms spiritual direction training alone.
Overview
Situation: Spiritual directors are trained to companion others through the deepest questions of meaning, identity, and faith. While some spiritual direction training programs focus on contemplative practice and listening skills, the emotional and psychological dimensions of the director’s own development may be less explicitly emphasized. The question is whether adding evidence-based EQ and SEQ tools could strengthen that formation.
Solution: Lynette Vaive, DMin, MBA, PCC, co-author of Six Seconds’ SEQ (Spiritual Emotional Intelligence) assessment, developed in partnership with Six Seconds’ partner Spirit of EQ – designed and delivered a structured EQ and SEQ intervention for spiritual directors in training at the Haden Institute in Hendersonville, North Carolina. Participants completed the SEI and SEQ assessments, received individual coaching debriefs, attended EQ and SEQ training workshops, and received weekly reinforcement emails over 10–12 weeks. The study used a pre/post design with a control group across two training modalities: low-residential and fully virtual.
Results: When EQ and SEQ interventions were combined, 56% of low-residential participants and all 6 virtual participants showed meaningful improvement across 30% or more of their measures – compared to 40% in the control group who received no intervention. Every one of the nine SEQ tiles improved across all three groups, suggesting the SEQ framework measures dimensions of development that spiritual direction training itself naturally cultivates.
“Seeing the connection between emotional awareness and spiritual growth was a game changer for me. I would like to continue to learn more.”
– Participant, Virtual Group
Situation
Spiritual direction is one of the oldest forms of human accompaniment – a practice of holy listening in which a trained director helps another person attend to the movements of the Spirit in their life. Programs like the Haden Institute’s two-year training prepare spiritual directors through intensive formation in contemplative practice, Jungian psychology, and the Enneagram. What these programs have traditionally not addressed systematically is the emotional intelligence of the director in training – the very capacities that determine how fully present, self-aware, and attuned a director can be with a client.
Research supports the connection. Cindy Wigglesworth’s work on Spiritual Intelligence demonstrates that EQ development is a necessary precondition for deeper spiritual development: a foundation of self-awareness and empathy must be in place before the interior work of spiritual growth can fully proceed. West, Oswald, and Guzman (2018) make the case specifically for religious leaders, arguing that EQ skills allow them to earn trust, create connection, and have a positive influence on those in their spiritual care.
The research question guiding this study was twofold: Would adding EQ and SEQ interventions produce measurably greater development in spiritual directors in training, compared to spiritual direction training alone? And would the two training modalities, low-residential and virtual, produce different results when both received the same interventions?
Solution
Beginning in 2024, Lynette Vaive designed and delivered a two-phase intervention for spiritual directors in training at the Haden Institute. Participants in two active cohorts – a low-residential group (Group 1, n=10) and a virtual group (Group 2, n=7 at start) – were offered the EQ and SEQ program as an optional addition to their Haden curriculum. A third cohort (Group 3, n=12) served as a control, completing the assessments without any debrief, coaching, or training.
The first intervention focused on Emotional Intelligence: participants completed the SEI assessment, received a one-on-one coaching debrief, attended two EQ training workshops, and received weekly reinforcement emails for 10–12 weeks. The second intervention followed the same structure using the SEQ (Spiritual Emotional Intelligence) assessment and report, a tool co-developed by Lynette and Jim Vaive with Six Seconds’ CEO Joshua Freedman and the Spirit of EQ team, designed specifically to measure the spiritual dimensions of emotional intelligence.
The SEQ assessment adds 20 validated questions to the SEI, generating scores across three Domains of connection (Awareness, Belonging, Insight), three Drivers (Service, Balance, Direction), and nine actionable Tiles. Assessments were administered at the start and again approximately 14–16 months into the two-year program, allowing pre/post comparison within and across groups.
“I believe EQ and SEQ are essential components for working with others in any capacity. Their inclusion in the training deepened my awareness and expanded the skills I can draw upon.”
– Participant, Low-Residential Group
Results
Pre/post controlled study with three groups. Two intervention groups (low-residential, n=10; virtual, n=7) received individual assessment debriefs, EQ and SEQ training workshops, optional coaching sessions, and weekly reinforcement emails. A control group (n=12) completed the assessments without any intervention. All groups were reassessed approximately 14–16 months into Haden’s two-year spiritual direction training program.
VIRTUAL PARTICIPANTS IMPROVED
All 6 virtual group participants who completed the full program showed meaningful gains across 30% or more of combined EQ and SEQ measures, compared to 40% in the control group.
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INTERVENTION VS CONTROL
More than half (56%) of low-residential participants who engaged with the EQ and SEQ program showed meaningful combined gains, compared to 40% of the control group who received no coaching or training – only the assessments.
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SEQ TILES IMPROVED
All 9 SEQ practice tiles improved across all 3 groups, including the control group, suggesting alignment between the SEQ framework and development work already present in spiritual direction training.
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“It demystifies some of the aspects of emotional/spiritual development. With desire and dedication, we can make progress.”
– Participant, Low-Residential Group
Findings
The Combined Effect: Looking at EQ or SEQ gains in isolation tells only part of the story. When results are examined together, the advantage of the full EQ+SEQ intervention becomes clear: participants who engaged with both showed a pattern of development that the control group, despite progressing through the same Haden curriculum, did not match. The combined approach appears to accelerate and deepen what spiritual direction training begins.
Engagement Is the Variable: Individual results varied significantly based on how deeply each participant chose to engage with the material. Those who used the weekly reinforcement emails, attended coaching sessions, and actively practiced the tools showed the strongest gains – in some cases improving 20–30% across multiple measures. This underscores a core finding of EQ research: development requires active practice, not passive exposure.
“It was a powerful experience to see the difference in the pre and post scores of those most engaged with the project interventions and even more powerful and humbling to hear their personal stories of the benefits of EQ and SEQ in the post-intervention conversations.”
– Dr. Lynette Vaive, Researcher
Products & Services Delivered
Six Seconds’ Emotional Intelligence Assessment™
SEI – Six Seconds’ Emotional Intelligence Assessment is a validated psychometric tool for measuring emotional intelligence, used by over 500,000 people worldwide. It provides in-depth feedback on specific EQ competencies and results and is ideal for 1:1 coaching or advanced training.
Spiritual Emotional Intelligence Assessment (SEQ)
Co-developed by Six Seconds and Spirit of EQ, the SEQ adds 20 validated questions to the SEI to measure the spiritual dimensions of emotional intelligence across three Domains, three Drivers, and nine actionable Tiles. The SEQ and its companion Development Report were central to the second phase of the intervention.
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