Emotional intelligence is the key to having a successful relationship with yourself and others, which in turn is the key to a long and satisfying life. These articles explore the relationship between emotional intelligence and relationships.
Recently… I told Emma (8-year-old daughter) she needed to get dressed to go. Instant protest, heel-dragging, power struggle. Yet we were going to do something she wanted! I observed a new cross-functional team starting up. The person assigned to schedule the first meeting asserted, “Since no one else wants to, I will chair the team.” […]
Read MoreThe drive to connect, to be accepted, is both glorious and brutal. It drives us to care and connect — and to engage in self-destructive behavior in a desperate bid to fit. The “thinness” of digital connection can’t actually be fixed by quantity — just as one can not get a healthy meal by eating a LOT of junk — but the thinness may drive people to want more.
Read MoreHow do we change out of a destructive pattern? Emma (my daughter, now 9) frequently makes a big fuss when it’s time to do work that’s not appealing, especially “dumb writing homework” (despite usually liking writing and being an outstanding student). This has gone on for years, but a couple of weeks ago I noticed […]
Read MoreEmotions serve to focus our attention on aspects of the world that help us thrive. They provide information about our interior world and about our relationships. For this survival function to operate optimally, we are highly sensitive to emotional signals in the environment. One person’s emotions are affected by others’. This effect is called “Emotional […]
Read MoreThis second half of “Fight or Flow” explores the alternative to the kinds of “hitting back first” reactions discussed in part one. To constructively engage with emotions requires reframing the way we think — and feel — about feelings. It’s always amazed me that these heavy stones can move — float — on a cushion […]
Read MoreWhy do we react – explode – shut down… and how can we use insights from current neuroscience to be less reactive?
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