EQ Reflection: Until It's Gone

It's amazing to wake up without pain -- something
I take for granted most of the time.

A "24 hour" stomach flu swept through my house this
week. I'll spare you the details; suffice it to say
it was ugly. On Wednesday night I went to sleep in
pain. It seemed every muscle ached; exhausted I
could barely fall asleep, tossing and turning.

I woke up to a delightful surprise -- less pain. I
still spent most of the day feeling like I'd been
kicked in the stomach by a horse... but compared to
Wednesday, it was nearly bliss.

This morning was even better. I woke up feeling
great! What a gift, one I've received nearly every
day of my life -- and ignored nearly every one of
those days.

My grandma is fairly infirm, and in that nagging
Jewish-grandmother kind of way is always telling me,
"Health is a blessing, you don't even know." So,
I'm a big enough person to say I think she's right.
If I could live as her for just a day, I'd totally
change my perspective about my health tomorrow.

It's astounding how much I take for granted. Most
days I appreciate my family for at least a moment;
usually I tell them I'm glad to be their Daddy,
and I hug my wife and tell her I love her -- and
most of the day I don't tap into that appreciation.

I often enjoy the roses outside my window, but many
days go by without even smelling one. I love the
taste of a great meal, but most days I don't savor
it. I'm sure there are a hundred things that I
would miss if they were gone -- but most of the time
I ignore them.

How about you?

Appreciation is the "anti-stress" feeling, so
there are practical reasons for taking time to feel
that love and gratitude. HeartMath has done such
fascinating research on the effects of this powerful
feeling (for example, see http://heartmath.org/research/research-abstracts/psychophys-coherence.html).

So perhaps this weekend it's time for abundant
appreciation? To begin a new habit, a new way of
seeing ourselves as truly blessed?

-> Say "Thank You" 10 times tomorrow.
-> Think about something you do really well, and do it
-> Set your watch to beep each hour, and when it
beeps, think about something you value or love.
-> Tell someone how they've inspired or helped you.
-> Lay down on the grass and watch the clouds and
think about how miraculous this world is.
-> Actually PLAY a game with a child, get on the
floor and don't just watch.
-> Make a huge collage of all the you appreciate.

I'm going to practice, and I hope you will too.
Please let me know what happens!


Appreciatively,
- Josh

PS. More on stress. For those of you who read last
Week's reflection about stress – you might be seeing a
connection. It's true that long-term stress reduces
immunity, especially those that "seem endless." This
link between pessimism, stress, and the immune system
is great evidence that emotional intelligence is part
of health. (By the way, short-term stress actually
improves immunity!) See:
http://www.apa.org/releases/stress_immune.html


======================================================
This is an EQ Reflection from the Six Seconds
Emotional Intelligence Network. Please forward to
others, and please keep this part too:
©2004, Joshua Freedman, http://www.6seconds.org

Joshua Freedman is the Director of Programs for
Six Seconds EQ Network and an expert teaching
emotional intelligence. To learn how EQ can help
your school, hospital, business, or family, please
visit http://www.6seconds.org