I arrived in Amsterdam this morning to meet with the EQ Europe team
planning the NexusEQ 2005 World Conference. It's now 4 am, and I
decided that rather than laying restlessly awake, I would take
advantage of jet lag and finish this article about sea glass and
overcoming adversity -- I hope it touches you.
- Josh



The Overcoming of It

"Although the world is full of suffering,
it is also full of the overcoming of it."
- Helen Keller

Sea glass is an unexpected flash of color against a sandy canvas.
These gemstones of glass are abraded by the sea, literally sanded
into smoothness. They seem to capture the sunlight and glow from
within, not shiny and glittering, but subtle, veiled, and mysterious.

Recently at the beach with the family, Patty (my wife), suggested
we look for it. Intrigued by her enthusiasm, I set out to find a
piece or two. At first, the sea glass was invisible to me --
camouflaged, it seemed, against the casual observer. Gradually I
began to find these tiny "gemstones" strewn amidst the rocks and
detritus of the shore.

The most beautiful of the sea glass has experienced the most
challenging journey. The sea pounds the glass, churning it
against rocky cliffs, breaking bottles and grinding pieces on
the sand. The rough edges are ground away by the constant churn
of the ocean. What's left is the essence, a luminous, subtle,
enduring core. Years of turmoil are distilled, strengthened,
into this gem-like glass.

As I looked and found the sea glass, I thought that many people
are like this glass, pounded by the "sea" of adversity. Through
brutality or neglect, or the tragedies of life and death, or even
near-crippling isolation, there are so many stories of pain, so
many stories of people shattered on the rocks.

I found a piece of amber glass, and thought of Joan, a mother
whose children seem locked into a cycle where they try to escape
into drugs.

Finding a teardrop of blue glass, I thought of Corin, a dear
friend all but abandoned as a young child.

A luminous clear piece reminded me of Wendy, whose daughter died
recently in a sudden car accident on an otherwise perfect day.

Each piece of glass became a symbol of a person cruelly tested.
The chits of glass mounded up like a litany of sorrows – and love.

Like the sea glass, many of us survive adversity, and more than
survive. Our rough edges become smoother, and what's truly
important becomes clear inside us. Somehow the adversity turns
to strength, and while there is pain, there is the overcoming of
it. Which comes from time, from love, and even from the hurt
itself -- like the crashing waves smooth the glass, pain polishes
our hearts.

Joan's struggles with her children's addictions has helped her
become someone who seems to have endless compassion -- and a
remarkable ability to see and speak truth. Corin's adversity
helped him become someone who is inescapably committed to his
family -- sorely tested again and again, he keeps finding the
courage to love. Wendy's pain is too recent, but I suspect it’s
already forging her incredible faith in God and in humanity.
The pain will always be there, but like the glass, time will
soften the edges of loss.

This journey of healing -- where love flourishes again brighter
than ever, where compassion deepens -- is a true testament to
human potential. So while the glass is a symbol of pain, its
beauty and power come from the overcoming of it.

As I searched out the pieces of glass, my vision changed. The
more I found, the easier it became to see. I began to wonder if
we could train ourselves to see into people this way? To see
that essence of love within those once abandoned, within those
still afraid, within the pain? I suspect that we can, and that
the more we see each other this way, the more easily we'll find
the "gemstones" in each other.

The sea glass is beautiful in any light, but it seems to crave
the sun. Wet from the ocean, it sits shining on the sand. Maybe
people are like that too -- ready to heal, on the cusp of shining.
And perhaps by simply by seeing into someone’s heart, cherishing
both their pain and the overcoming of it, we give them light, and
both shine more brightly.


==============
If you are someone who is like the sea glass, I would like you to
share your story if you are ready. Also, I would like to send you
a piece of the glass we found if you don’t have a piece already.

At Six Seconds, we believe that sharing stories of overcoming
adversity is an important way for people to heal and be healed.
So please email me your own story of "the overcoming of it" to
share on the web site. It would be especially helpful if you
would write about what helped you heal -- so others can see how
it is possible.

If you're in the US and you don't have sea glass, send your
address along with your story and I’ll send you a piece that my
family found.
To those of you around the world, I wish I could send it to you as
well, and I don’t have funds for all that postage. So instead of
mailing it abroad, I will put a picture on the web site for you.

With love,
- Josh

This is an EQ Reflection from the Six Seconds Emotional
Intelligence Network. Please forward to others, and please
keep this part too:
©2004, Joshua Freedman, http://www.6seconds.org