I just returned from Emma's preschool holiday show, 20 tots
reveling in holiday fun.

My favorite song was, "This Little Light of Mine," especially
when Teacher Sharon said, "Remember if you smile, your light
shines even brighter."

I started thinking about how in our daily lives -- no matter
what our age, our job, or situation -- we each have choices to
brighten or diminish our "little lights." There are the lights
inside each of us, and there are the lights we treasure around us.

The lights I treasure most are in Emma and Max, who've let me
be their Daddy. Sometimes I watch myself helping them shine
brighter, and sometimes I see their little crestfallen faces
when I am impatient or I take my frustration out on them.
I can SEE how I affect their lights.

What about the people around you? Can you SEE how you
brighten people's lights?

What actions can you take today that will brighten a light in
your office, in your family, in your neighborhood? And when
you take that action, what happens to your own light?

For children, perhaps this metaphor could help them see the
interdependence -- kids can learn to brighten lights or diminish
them.

Perhaps the biggest challenge for our EQ community is to
remember our own lights. It seems to me that when we give
light, we brighten. When we give, we receive. But when
we act from obligation, from "shoulds," from guilts, then
our lights dim.

At the same time, when we get out of emotional balance,
when we open ourselves to stressors, when we discharge
our resiliency batteries, then our lights fade no matter
how much we give. In a pattern of service, we give
ourselves constantly, and begin to see it as a sacrifice
rather than a gift.

That distinction is the key to "Give Yourself" in Six Seconds'
EQ model: If you truly give your caring, your time, your
attention, and your empathy -- and you do so from love not
obligation -- then your own emotional depth and clarity is
renewed. And you can't do it for others if you won't do it for
yourself.

So right now, brighten your light. Take six seconds and fill
your heart with gladness. Imagine 20 shining faces singing
just for you: "Won't let anyone puuffff it out, I'm going to let
it shine, let it shine, let it shine, let it shine."

With love,
- Josh

This is an EQ Reflection from http://www.6seconds.org
©2003 Joshua Freedman

Please pass it on.